Talking to your children about their feelings after a tragedy
In a crisis such as the recent floods in Texas, children and teens may feel sad, anxious, frightened, or confused. Talking to a trusted adult about what happened and how they are feeling is the best way to help them process their emotions.
Young people are likely to see or overhear upsetting news, videos, and images, especially if they have a phone or access to social media. Your children need your guidance and comfort.
Helpful tips to support children
#1: Find out what they know and explain what happened
Whether they heard or saw something about the disaster, it’s best to ask them what they have seen. Start with what they already know. Acknowledge what they are saying, clear up misunderstandings, and let their questions or statements guide the conversation. Remember to keep the discussion age-appropriate. You do not need to share every detail.
Helpful phrases include:
- “We’re here together and safe now.”
- “It’s OK to feel (sad, scared, etc.). I am sad, too.”
- “We are doing everything we can to stay safe.”
- “This (disaster) is not normal. This does not usually happen.”
#2: Answer their questions
Ask them what they want to know about what happened, and invite them to ask questions. Tell them you are there to help them understand and answer their questions honestly.
Questions may include things like:
- “What happened?”
- “Why did it happen?”
- “Will it happen again?”
- “Will it happen to me?”
- “Are we safe?”
- “How can we help?”
#3: Reassure them and offer comfort:
Children and teens need comfort during such heavy and sad moments.
- Offer them a hug.
- Give them a soft blanket or stuffed animal to snuggle.
- Let them know you are there for them.
- Point out the good things, saying, “So many people showed up to help.” As Mr. Rogers’ mom famously said, “Look for the helpers.”
- It may help them to see or hear about your family’s emergency preparations or to build an emergency kit together.
#4: Limit TV/social media:
Natural disasters and other tragedies dominate the news cycle, on TV and especially on social media. It’s helpful to take a break from constant images and reminders of what happened. You may want to ask teens to give you their phones or monitor or restrict their social media usage. For younger kids, model this by turning off the news and social media to spend time together, focusing on each other.
#5: Practice self-care:
Show your kids and teens how to calm themselves through deep breathing, taking a hot bath or a nap, or even eating comfort foods. You need this as much as they do.
#6: Take action:
Helping others feels good. Depending on your child’s age, you can find ways for them to help others by doing good in your community, even if it’s not related to the tragedy at hand. For example, older kids can walk shelter dogs, volunteer at a food bank, or sort donations at a donation drop-off. Younger kids can write thank you cards to first responders, help collect or shop for donations, and go with you to drop them off.
Above all, let your children know you are there for them and that they can always come to you with questions or fears. If your child cannot move past these feelings, and especially if you experienced the disaster firsthand or have lost someone, find a professional mental health expert for them to talk to. Community First Health Plans Members can see a mental health provider without a referral as a covered benefit.
Sources:
1) Reece, T., Taylor, J. (2025, July 7). How To Talk To Kids About the Texas Floods and Other Natural Disasters. Parents.com. Parents.com/talking-to-kids-about-natural-disasters-8771350. 7/8/2025.
2) Schonfeld, D., Needle, S. (2024, September 26). Hurricanes & Floods: Taking Care of Your Children and Yourself. HealthyChildren.org – American Academy of Pediatrics. HealthyChildren.org/English/healthy-living/emotional-wellness/Pages/Responding-to-Childrens-Emotional-Needs-During-Times-of-Crisis.aspx. 7/8/2025.
3) Villalpando, N. (2025, July 7). How to talk to kids about Texas floods and other natural disasters. Austin-American Statesman. Statesman.com/Story/News/2025/07/07/How-to-Talk-to-Kids-About-Texas-Floods-and-Other-Natural-Disasters/84494286007. 7/8/2025.
4) Offering Comfort in Scary Times. Sesame Street. SesameWorkshop.org/Resources/Offering-Comfort-in Scary-Times. 7/7/2025.
5) Talking to Children About Emergencies. Sesame Street. SesameWorkshop.org/Resources/Talking-to-Children-About-Emergencies. 7/7/2025.
6) Flash Floods and Flood Recovery: Disaster Management Resources. American Academy of Pediatrics (October 25, 2024. AAP). AAP.org/en/patient-care/disasters-and-children/disaster-management-resources-by-topic/flash-floods-and-flood-recovery/.